After the cremation services of your deceased loved one, you may feel at a loss on what to do about the cremation remains. Often, the ashes are placed inside temporary cremation urns. However, you can opt to transfer it to a customized one, or you can release the ashes in the deceased’s favorite spot. Alternatively, you can also bury the ashes in your own garden.
Getting your hands dirty by toiling with soil can be very therapeutic after a loss. Experts call this earthing or grounding, which can alleviate stress, help reset your circadian rhythms, and offer comfort. Likewise, planting a garden means surrounding yourself with an abundance of plant life, helping you manage your grief.
If you are at a loss on what to do or where to start, consider placing a part of the ashes in your memorial garden as a way to honor your loved one. There are no strict rules about what to do with the ashes, and you don’t have to keep them all in an urn. It is perfectly okay to use a portion of that ashes in your garden. Gardening is a perfect way to cope and put yourself on a path to healing. Here’s how you can get that done.
Decide on the Size
Although your grief may feel enormous, your garden can be any size you like. If you’ve got limited space, a single flower bed or tree in your tiny yard will suffice. Alternatively, a few potted plants by the balcony will also work well if you live in an apartment. You can mix a portion of the ash with potting soil in a specific container so you’ll always know where it is. Some people just bury everything under one tree.
Just keep in mind, this garden is yours, and you can do whatever you want with it. For example, if you’re going to decorate the whole backyard but feel overwhelmed, you can start with a small corner enough to fit a single bush. Then, later on, you can add more plans to memorialize your departed loved one.
Select a Location
When crafting your garden, pick a good location. It would be best to work with an area that gets tons of sunlight and naturally receives a fair amount of water. A private space is also the most ideal so you can sit there and reminisce in peace.
But, again, if you live in a condo, you can still make a memorial garden because many varieties of plants thrive well in containers. You can even paint the pots, which is another therapeutic endeavor to release your emotions. Then, you can add ribbons using your loved one’s favorite color. You can also add little embellishments, like tiny statues of the things your departed loved one felt passionate about.
Pick the Plant Variants
Now comes another fun part! Choosing plants to beautify your garden is an enjoyable and worthwhile endeavor. It would be best to select plants that make you think about your loved one. This is a great way to honor their memory. Some points to ponder on as you pick are:
- Pick flowers that your deceased loved one enjoyed.
- Select flowers that bloom in the favorite color of the dead.
- Work with a favorite scent of the deceased, like jasmine or roses.
- Make sure to plant trees that fit the given space.
Notably, many plants carry different meanings. For instance, pink carnations signify remembrance or memories. Daisy or white lilies are commonly given at funerals because they embody peace and purity, representing the peaceful state of the soul. Moreover, you can select plants with inspirational names like the unique guardian angel Hosta, forget me not, or peace rose. Don’t worry too much about the design, as this should be a fun and stress-free project. Let your heart be your guide.
It would be a good idea to combine different plants for variety. For example, you can mix shorter plants, placing them in front, with taller shrubs behind them. If you include a tree, you need plenty of space for the plant to grow. Take note of where the roots will be because you don’t want them to creep into your pipelines. The right conditions will ensure that your plants survive and thrive.
Consider Placing Decorative Touches
Incorporate decorative emblems that reflect the personality of your loved one. You can include them in your garden so that you, your family members, and visitors can enjoy sitting there too. Consider adding chimes, emblems, weather-proof memorabilia, etc. Most of all, make space for a seating area so you can commune with nature and think of beautiful memories in peace.
This garden is your space, and you can customize it the way you like. Incorporate items that make you think of your loved one. As you keep yourself busy setting this up, it can occupy your time and help you manage your loss. Besides, planting a memorial garden is a significant tribute to honor the life that was lost. Although the body may be gone from this earthly world, the memories left behind indeed live on forever.